- Borrow money from pessimists, they don’t expect it back.
- Nothing is foolproof to a talented fool.
- An oil sheik says in a gallery:
I really admire Picasso.
There is nobody who was able to sell oil so expensive.
- Who was the world’s first stock broker? Noah – He floated his stock while the world was in liquidation.
- An investor to his advisor:
What leads most people into debt? Trying to catch up with people who are already there.
Is really all my money gone? No, of course not. It’s just with somebody else!
Don’t marry for money; you can borrow it cheaper.
- If you think no one cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.
- The cost of living is the difference between your net income and your gross habits!
- Money is always there, but the pockets change.
- Foreign Aid:
The transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries.
- Remember the golden rule:
Those who have the gold make the rules.
- “A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it.”
- When the CEO dropped his brownie on the calculator, was he trying to fudge the numbers?
- Securities are the cause of many people's insecurities.
- When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators.
- Rule No.1: Never lose money, Rule No.2: Never forget rule No.1.
- Maybe money corrupts the character; but lack of money isn't going to improve it either.
- I saw a bank that said if offered 24 Hour Banking." But I didn’t go in. I didn’t have that much time.
- Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so you can die rich.
- In the business world, the rearview mirror is always clearer than the windshield.
- As long as people will accept crap, it will be financially profitable to dispense it.
- The government deficit is the difference between the amount of money the government spends and the amount it has the nerve to collect.
- The safest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it in your pocket.
- Money can’t buy happiness, but it can make you awfully comfortable while you’re being miserable.
- Business: The art of extracting money from another man's pocket without resorting to violence.
- The opulence of the front office decor varies inversely with the fundamental solvency of the firm.
- Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.
- A careful study of economics usually reveals that the best time to buy anything is last year.